I want something more than this mediocrity. I want complexity that is filled with passion and inspiration, something that you want to wake up everyday and feel excited about. Lately, everything has been falling into this void and no matter how I fill in the gaps with all of these insignificant pursuit, it all end up being swallowed into this black hole that keeps growing while I traverse this life.
Don’t whine and complain when you fail. Get up, do it again, and try harder.
Sharing some tough love for you all, I have written a lot of Note For The Day posts here, and just a little fun fact about those is that I’m not only posting it for my readers, before it becomes someone to read, these notes are mine first. Every time that I write these kinds of posts, it comes out of an argument I had with myself. My pessimistic and optimistic side often argues, and these notes are the outcome of my optimistic side winning the argument. I am proud of those moments, these notes remind me of those. These notes are also for me— I beat the doubts, and I get to encourage and motivate myself. This is my 19th note, I won at least 19 times. Well, it doesn’t beat the number of times that I lost but I still get to win, and that’s all that matters. I can beat my doubting self, I just have to try everyday and keep beating it even if it means I get to lose most days.
Today is one of those winning days. I’m feeling motivated, I got a little bit of tough love and pep talk from myself and I’m going to make the most out of it. I’m going to be productive today hooray for me!
I want to be selfish every once in a while but I look at my hand, that gold metal band around my finger reminded me that this isn’t just about me anymore. I gave up a piece of me when I said ‘I do’, and that piece of me I gave it to you, the other part of me wanted to be freed and just wanted to go back to the way it was before. But I took a vow to be with you in anyhow, to always be together even in times of doubt and remind each other why we’re here now. We won’t forget because I chose you and we’re here from every sunrise until every sunset.
Most of us want to be different but what is being different? How do you define it? When everybody wants to be different then that means all of us are the same right? We all want the same thing, how does that make us any different?
Being different equally means being special, to be set apart from the rest, to be unique. We are all unique in our own way but most of us crave for being “different”. I guess we all have our own meaning to that word but most of us use that word to break out from our normal world. Like, being in line with a family of doctors but you wanted to break out from that and you wanted to become a writer instead. Or how your father wanted you to follow on his footsteps as a professional basketball player but you wanted to be a musician etc. Most of us grew up with a built path already, and we just have to walk on it. And some of us want to build our own. Which made me think that being different is not actually being different from the rest but becoming like the rest who are happy and successful, to follow their own passion and path.
“I want to be different” is not actually craving to be set apart, it is craving to be a part of something special and worthwhile. Being different is not going against the flow but being in the flow in the right river.