I want something more than this mediocrity. I want complexity that is filled with passion and inspiration, something that you want to wake up everyday and feel excited about. Lately, everything has been falling into this void and no matter how I fill in the gaps with all of these insignificant pursuit, it all end up being swallowed into this black hole that keeps growing while I traverse this life.
I want to be selfish every once in a while but I look at my hand, that gold metal band around my finger reminded me that this isn’t just about me anymore. I gave up a piece of me when I said ‘I do’, and that piece of me I gave it to you, the other part of me wanted to be freed and just wanted to go back to the way it was before. But I took a vow to be with you in anyhow, to always be together even in times of doubt and remind each other why we’re here now. We won’t forget because I chose you and we’re here from every sunrise until every sunset.
It’s a maze up there and I often get lost, too anxious to care. So, I built up walls to block the paths that lead to doors, it hides my past and many more.
I wish there was a map to help me get out of my own mind But I realized I built these paths to get lost and for no one to find… me. I chose to be a settler and now I regret the maze that I made— I now live in to suffer.