THESE ARE THE LOST WRITINGS WHERE UNPUBLISHED AND FORGOTTEN POETRY FINALLY COMES TO LIGHT.
Those snide remarks that you make
leaves a mark but it doesn’t show.
You see it in the smiles that I fake,
you made me laugh at my own flaws.
The things I feel insecure about
are the things I hate myself for.
But you clearly pointed them out
and you made me hate myself more.
You shoot at my confidence
just to make yourself look cool.
Now, I just sit here in silence
while you make me look like a fool.
Maybe kindness is nothing.
Maybe empathy is gone
and it all made me thinking
that love is just a big illusion.
I wrote a bunch of poetry back in 2017, it was all over the place so I finally retrieved it from my old broken laptop and some were from my old journal pages that I may have forgotten about.
For the next few days I decided to publish some of it here since I am currently uninspired to write. So, forgive these old words that I hope you’ll like.
The hands on the clock
keeps spinning fast
and I would give it all up
just to turn it back to the time
when you and I had this luck.
Life was simple and colorful
but suddenly everything just
turns into black including our soul.
Sometimes other people’s mentality surprises me not in the amazing way but in a way that makes you roll your eyes and makes you do a face-palm, I also can’t believe how shallow people can get like “are you serious?” — I sometimes want to be frank and just tell them to shut up (not really) but it sometimes annoys me and I try to remind myself to just breathe and just be understanding and respectful towards other people’s views until my feeling of annoyance subsides.
Okay, I have this person in my life who is very full of himself and sometimes his mentality on certain things are very shallow or sometimes he just sees the issue as one sided (his version only) I sometimes try to talk to him and respectfully point out his wrong or just state my point of view but when I sense that he’s not gonna let the issue go I’m the one who lets it go because I know I’m never gonna hear the end of it and I just hope that he’ll figure it out himself. I don’t know how you handle these kind of people, I sometimes just want to erase them in my life ’cause I think they’re toxic but I have a strong belief in kindness and these “toxic” people need more of that. I just have to double up my patience and understanding toward these kind of people or I probably should just forget about them, should I?
For week 3 of the kindness challenge I chose these words to be instilled in me to help me with the week’s challenge.
“Will God be smiling with what I’m about to do?”
I always ask myself this question before I do or say something, will He be smiling? My faith has done a lot for me it gave me strength and courage to face everyday, it gives me hope for brighter days and it also made me a nicer person. When I do something nice I feel that He’s proud of me and when I do something unpleasant I feel that I disappointed Him and my conscience bugs me that I feel a bit off because of it, basically this question is really helpful when I’m not sure with what I’m doing.
Acknowledging God in my life changed me into a completely different person I began thinking what is right and what is wrong, what is good and what is bad, my bad temper was lessen, I now always give everyone the benefit of the doubt and try to see the good in everyone.
“Never expect anything in return from the kindness that you’ve given.”
The thing about being kind and helping others is that you think twice if the person deserves that kindness and help and we often ask ourselves “what do we get out of it?”, “what’s in it for us?”. We should all change that kind of thinking, let’s be selfless because doesn’t it just feels good when you help others? Nothing feels better than the satisfaction and the pride you get when you do good deeds.
Reflection: I find it easier to be kind especially to others once you believe in the act of kindness and you instilled goodness in your mind and in your heart, being kind will not be a problem if you do that and yes people around me believe that I’m kind (I think so lol) and I feel that I’m giving too much that others take advantage of it, sometimes I think that I should just be wise and think only about myself but my conscience will never take it so right now I just think that as long as I know I’m doing the right thing and my conscience is clear it’s all good and to the people who take advantage of the kindness that they receive that’s on them and that’s their baggage to carry.
CHECK OUT THE KINDNESS CHALLENGE OVER HERE
*Photos are not mine. Credits to the photo owners.