MY CHOICES

 
​There are so many voices
 
influencing my choices

and my mind is a mess

I think I want the best

but I’m becoming less

of who I really am.

I think my life is in vain,

maybe I’m not supposed to play this game.

It’s becoming lame. 

Do you feel the same?

Like you’re not where you’re supposed to be,

these are not what you’re supposed to see,

we’re supposed to be free but where are we?

Me? I’m still here, living in fears.

Okay I need to breathe, I need a beer.

I have this mind I need to clear.

I fall into temptations,

think I have no other options,

now I ask for my salvation.

I point and aim,

though I’m the one to blame.

I made the flame,

now it’s on fire,

it’s not what I desire,

now I’m in dire 

need of help—

I need to save myself.

The choices I’ve made

led to this fate,

I run towards my faith,

am I already too late? 

THE BIBLE APP

A few weeks ago I came across this cool bible app and I’m actually quite obsessing over it. It’s called YouVersion Bible App and it lets you read the bible in an interesting way, where you get to choose bible plans to read in a specific time frame. I’ve already completed 5 plans and I have 5 on-going plans that I’m trying to finish. This app helps me read the bible in a less boring way and the passages make sense to me with the help of the plans. 
 
(1) There are a lot of great plans you can read through this app that will help your spirituality and also help you emotionally. Having a bible app is a must, when everything can be a click away we all need to check-up on our spirituality and faith and what a great way to do that with just a click on your devices. (2) With this app you also get to save, bookmark and highlight those verses that struck you, (3) there is also a feature called “verse of the day” to remind you of your daily readings. (4) You can also have it in different versions, I have mine in New International Version (NIV). 


 
The reason I downloaded this app is because I need to strengthen my faith again. My faith kind of lost its way that’s why I needed to regain my beliefs, so every time I feel so overwhelm with my thoughts and emotions and every night I couldn’t sleep I usually open this bible app every now and then to calm myself down. I have realized so many things in my life for the last weeks, most of it are not so good realizations that I need to get over and need to learn to control that’s why I really need God’s presence in my life right now, I need His words to guide me because right now His words are the only thing that comforts me.
 
I must say that YouVersion bible app is a great app that every believer should have in their phones, it is a great way to read the bible and a fun way to keep your faith in check. 😊

KINDNESS CHALLENGE WEEK 3

For week 3 of the kindness challenge I chose these words to be instilled in me to help me with the week’s challenge.

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“Will God be smiling with what I’m about to do?”

I always ask myself this question before I do or say something, will He be smiling? My faith has done a lot for me it gave me strength and courage to face everyday, it gives me hope for brighter days and it also made me a nicer person. When I do something nice I feel that He’s proud of me and when I do something unpleasant I feel that I disappointed Him and my conscience bugs me that I feel a bit off because of it, basically this question is really helpful when I’m not sure with what I’m doing.

Acknowledging God in my life changed me into a completely different person I began thinking what is right and what is wrong, what is good and what is bad, my bad temper was lessen, I now always give everyone the benefit of the doubt and try to see the good in everyone.

“Never expect anything in return from the kindness that you’ve given.”

The thing about being kind and helping others is that you think twice if the person deserves that kindness and help and we often ask ourselves “what do we get out of it?”, “what’s in it for us?”. We should all change that kind of thinking, let’s be selfless because doesn’t it just feels good when you help others? Nothing feels better than the satisfaction and the pride you get when you do good deeds.

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Reflection: I find it easier to be kind especially to others once you believe in the act of kindness and you instilled goodness in your mind and in your heart, being kind will not be a problem if you do that and yes people around me believe that I’m kind (I think so lol) and I feel that I’m giving too much that others take advantage of it, sometimes I think that I should just be wise and think only about myself but my conscience will never take it so right now I just think that as long as I know I’m doing the right thing and my conscience is clear it’s all good and to the people who take advantage of the kindness that they receive that’s on them and that’s their baggage to carry.

CHECK OUT THE KINDNESS CHALLENGE OVER HERE

RevofKindness

 

*Photos are not mine. Credits to the photo owners.

WE ARE FORTUNATE

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I was supposed to write about this the other day but due to loads of school works and also household chores I wasn’t able to write it.

Okay so last Monday February 29, 2016 heard a somewhat sad but also inspirational story. This guy entered our room after our Philippine Literature subject I thought he was just going to conduct a survey for their thesis but then he started his speech with the words that he is lowering his pride for what he was about to do, he then started talking about his sister who is sick. At first I thought it was all an act, I thought he’s just performing a monologue or whatever because our subject is Literature and all we do there is to perform or act but as he goes on talking about his sister with full conviction that’s when I realized that everything that I’m hearing from him are true and my heart just melted.

The guy is also a student in the university that I’m going to so as his sick sister but she stopped going to school due to stage 4 cancer (I forgot the type of cancer she has) even though she was still so eager to go to school even with her situation. She went through many operations and now she only has one leg due to a tumor that just suddenly appears on her leg and now she’s still fighting a tough battle and her brother is asking for help to fund her treatment which cost around 2 Million pesos (44K dollars), I think you’ll get more sick when you see the cost of the treatment. Anyways, I thought soliciting funds for personal use is not allowed in the university but with this case I don’t care about the rules I want my schoolmate to get better, the guy also presented a video of her sister showing us a glimpse of her situation and thanking everyone who’s willing to help her. I think all of us in that room did not hesitate to give what they can. I really admire what her brother is doing I just witnessed true love with what he did.

After that heart melting speech that I think lasted for about less than 10 minutes from that guy, that story was all in my head that time even when I went home, actually until now I’m still thinking about her. I actually added her on Facebook that day and also sent her a message of encouragement to keep fighting. Seeing her on Facebook with that big smile on her face and also her optimism about her situation makes me think that what the heck am I worrying about my life right now? My situation is a thousand much more better than hers. I’m complaining about shallow things and also about school when this girl wanted to badly go to school but she can’t. Her story made me realized how fortunate I am that I am alive, healthy and I get to do things that other people wished that they had the chance to do.

We are taking our life for granted and complain a lot about simple stuff. We tend to compare our lives with other people. We never get satisfied of what we have. Well in fact we are much more fortunate than other people. If you have a house to go home to and keep you safe and warm YOU ARE FORTUNATE. If you have a complete family YOU ARE FORTUNATE. If you can go to school, if you have clothes to wear, if you have enough money to buy food, if you get to eat three meals a day, and if you get to wake up everyday alive and healthy YOU ARE FORTUNATE.
 

P.S. I hope this girl survive and I get to see her in her school uniform soon. God is good I know he give tough challenges to the strong ones.

P.P.S. Her name is Angeline please include her in your prayers.

WHEN I THOUGHT I WAS ALONE

Back to the time when I just felt like I have nobody to rely on, nobody cared, I was all alone.

I was taking this journey on my own, I basically lived my life carrying my whole self. The family I have grew up with is not the kind of family that shows affection, we never asked each other about our day, we just go on individually and it’s like if we know that each of us are still breathing and alive we know that everything is just fine but they never knew that I was barely catching my breath. So I prefer the company of my friends but even though I’m having fun with them I still feel so alone.Read More »