We all have our own tragedies and we all deal with it differently, our ways might be different from one another but we all have the same goal and that is to go through it and move on.
We all have our ways of coping with things and we do things that can be unexplainable and unexpected but we do these things because we believe that it will somehow lessen the pain and it will help us move on eventually. There are things that are unlikely for us to do, that our own friends and family disagree with it, and there are times that we ignore their advice and still do the things that they told us not to do. They will be frustrated even to the point of not understanding us anymore and to them we are just being unreasonable, but to us everything still hurts.
People need to understand that everyone has different ways of dealing with things, they have different grieving process. You may not understand it but at least respect it, most of the time people dealing with so much heart break or sadness, they eventually figure it out on their own. The things that they are doing is vital to their process. Talking to them and giving them advice is okay but never point out the mistakes they’re doing because they know it already, never assume that when you give advice they will be okay right away, it is never easy to fully move on. Allow them to grieve and allow them to feel things and go through it, never invalidate their emotions and just be there for them. But if you disagree and don’t understand their process to respect it, might as well ignore it for the sake of their wellness and yours too.
One of the main reason why I don’t usually view my social media accounts lately is because of how toxic it can be. Like, photos of Billie Eilish normally walking outside in a normal attire, in her normal body is circulating in my timeline right now. I also see Angel Locsin’s photo that shows the changes in her body. Apparently, people are saying that they gained weight, and making fun of it. I thought people are tired of “fat” jokes by now, sadly they aren’t.
Billie and Angel are perfect in their own bodies, as long as they are healthy their bodies are fine. I feel sorry for celebrities who face this kind of scrutiny, that’s why they go to doctors to fix something in their face or body that isn’t even broken in the first place just to get approval, and to satisfy the people. I’m not a follower of Billie but I read that she wears baggy clothes to steer clear of being objectified, it is crazy to think that she really adjusted herself to avoid people from checking her out. To think that her choice of clothing is not just a brand but a protection as well, which clearly shows why with that trending photo.
Another thing that I’ve been seeing online is Rebel Wilson’s weight loss. They introduced Rebel Wilson’s “fat amy” persona creating a confident plus-sized representation, and thinking that it was cool but then I learned that Hollywood encouraged Rebel to stay as overweight as she can be, because people “dig” it, and they gain more money. And, now Rebel lost a lot of weight and she’s feeling more herself. This is not contradicting the media’s move with plus-sized representation, I am glad that the entertainment industry is open with diversity but forcing people to be in a shape that they don’t want to be in is not okay.
Another example is the heartthrob Zac Efron, did you know that Zac hated his body in the movie Baywatch? Zac was ripped and really buffed in that movie, he went on a very strict regimen, and even said that he wouldn’t let himself and his body go through it again.
Another is Jacob Elordi in Kissing Booth, he hated his body in the movie too but he said that the movie required him to have his body like that.
For sure, there are more celebrities and other people who experienced this cruel requirement.
For the longest time, society set out some standards that we have to follow; how to act, what is acceptable, and what is beautiful. And the opposite of those are just a subject of a laughing matter or an insult, something that we should change as it somehow degrades our whole being. We are trying to break out from those standards but sadly it isn’t enough, we still have narrow minded people who see these “imperfections” as a joke material. They are happily tearing down people’s spirits because of these standards, making these beautiful people feel less of what they are worth, and for the longest time we have been living in a world full of these kinds of people. It’s our body and we should have control over it, we should be happy with it without feeling insecure and without the need of validation from others. These unrealistic standards are the world’s toxic fuel, it’s time to drain them out and remove from the society’s norms.
Your body is fine, your color is fine, your face is fine, it’s just the society and the world that isn’t fine.
What are your thoughts about the unrealistic standards the society has set out for us?
I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety and bipolar disorder since I was little. The bipolar just leaves me to be an emotional time bomb. Everything someone does could piss me off and I don’t even understand why. My boyfriend showing me how much it’s a problem is what led me to get help for that. My mind is constantly a war zone when I’m off my meds though. I’m fighting with myself about everything. Anxious to do something but too depressed to do it. Going to school became a struggle for a couple years. I couldn’t work because I had no motivation. I’d go months without showering or doing basic hygienic things which drove my anxiety crazy but I just couldn’t do it. My room would pile up with dishes and clothes and trash and just life. When I did leave my house I was always anxious. What if something happened? What if people don’t like me? What if someone yells at me? What if someone laughs at me? Etc etc. I don’t think I ever really found a way to cope non medically. Like I just found ways around it. I was scared people would laugh at me for being different so I looked and acted the same as everyone else. I was scared someone would yell at me so I was as nice as as nice could get to make people happy. I carry pepper spray for the anxiety of something happening. I’m on Prozac and triliptil (sp?) to control my depression and anxiety and also anger issues, and it helps a lot. It numbs my mind and lets me think individual thoughts instead of everything all at once constantly. My mind isn’t a war zone anymore. I don’t freak out on people for small things anymore. It helps.
Disclaimer: ALL VIEWS AND COMMENTS MADE ON THIS BLOG IS NOT IN ANY WAY A MEDICAL OR PROFESSIONAL ADVICE. THESE ARE ALL FOR THE PURPOSE OF DISCUSSIONS AND OPINIONS.
Having a mental illness affects our whole lifestyle. I can relate with our story sender about how we forget to take care of ourselves most of the time. I remember being so lazy to get up and eat or take a shower, I didn’t care anymore and I felt so lifeless. I felt exhausted without doing anything. I felt the heaviness of the lack of motivation and will to get up to do simple tasks. This is just one of the many effects of a mental illness to someone. It gets too much, and it doesn’t only affects our own lives but it also affects the lives of our loved ones. If you’re capable, take the initiative to get help. We all need to help ourselves, there are information online where you can find help. Though, I wish there are more resources for mental health, I wish getting help are more accessible to many people. I’m hoping that there are more attention to the needs of this community. Mental illness is real, and we need more accessible healthcare for it.
Thank you to our story sender for this week. I hope you are doing okay and well, stay alive my friend. 🤗
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Always remember to be kind, not just on others but also on yourself. See you on my next post! ❤