I’m sitting here in my chair in front of my computer, and I’m suddenly thinking of why I have friends. Seriously, why do I have friends? If you met me, I don’t have the friendliest face in the world. I’m not going to be the first one who will initiate a conversation, I’m going to smile but I won’t be the first one who will say something. I can also be the most boring person at first because I’m not comfortable with a person that I barely know. And, now I’m thinking how did I get all of my friends to be my friend?
I’ve established in one of my post that I’m “the quiet one”, I don’t talk much if it’s not needed and I don’t know how you make friends if you’re not a talker but I have these friends that I talk nonsense things to nowadays, and most of them chose me to be their friend or they were stuck with me, either way it turned into genuine friendships. My friends and I have different personalities but same mindsets, and I’m lucky to have found people who are so different from me but also have a lot of similarities with. Honestly, making friends was always my problem back in school, every year I will be with different groups of students except in high school where I stayed with the same classmates for most of my high school life. I was always hoping someone would talk to me and be my friend, and that sort of happen year by year. And, in high school I met my best friend for almost 10 years now and in college that happened too, in short I had friends and I’m currently questioning that right now because I met myself, I think I’m a great person but I’m honestly not that friendly at first sight. I should probably ask them right?
Anyways, this is just some random thoughts and it made me feel grateful for my friends, who I consider my family as well. I’m actually more comfortable around them than my own family. And, thinking all about it, making friends is really important, these people are going to be one of your anchor and rock when things get tough or when you’re too conscious to talk about things with your family. Creating genuine friendships is one of the things that make this life bearable, it makes life easier, and it makes life fun. If you have this you’re very lucky and if you’re going through rough patches with your friends talk things through because you’ll need each other in this crazy life.
I had these thoughts along side listening to LANY’s song Where The Hell Are My Friends? I usually listen to this song when I’m feeling alone but the thoughts that I had was why do I have friends? lol.
December is my favorite month, it’s weird because most people usually has their birth month as their favorite month, I also love my birth month which is August because of the comfort I find in the rainy season but December is different, it’s a happy month. We all celebrate it around the world, with all the parties, the chaotic Christmas shopping, and just the whole festive vibe leading to Christmas day is just awesome. But this year is different and it’s feels weird to celebrate Christmas.
The year 2020 is such a horror, everything that we’ve been through this year is unbelievable, surviving the year full of breakdowns and disappointments is incredible for each and everyone of us. Ending the year with a celebration is just what we all deserve to have but I feel like not celebrating this year. It used to be so much fun when the month of December enters, I used to really feel the Christmas spirit like worrying what to wear in Christmas parties, deciding what to buy for Christmas presents, and just the whole planning with family and friends on what to do for Christmas. Right now, with the pandemic it’s all impossible to do when parties and gatherings are prohibited, when being close to each other is a risk. It’s really difficult to feel happy right now when a lot of people are battling this virus that made this year feel like hell. I really want to be in that Christmas spirit but when I try to go outside, it feels like just a normal day for everyone, it feels like everyone is also not feeling the spirit of Christmas. Anyways, it’s still days before Christmas day maybe this will change, who knows?
Sorry for the depressing writings these last few days, I promise to lighten it up on my next blog posts lol. I’ll just leave you with a classic Christmas song that I usually hear on the radio when I was young during Christmas time.
Currently on a blogging break again not because I’m lazy (again) but because we moved out from our home that is being renovated, we moved in to a small apartment for awhile until our house is done. So, I haven’t been able to focus with all our stuff lying around in this apartment.
Though, I’ve been thinking of a lot of ideas to blog about, I just haven’t been able to write it lol. That is why the drafts on my phone is wildly increasing as of the moment 😅. Full of unfinished writings and ideas, hopefully our house will be done before Christmas. My family decided to fix our house so that there’s something good that happened to all of us this year, which was a very good idea. What a way to welcome a new year with a newly renovated home. ☺️
Of course, I’m going to blog about it. Can’t wait for Christmas! ☺️🎄🎅🏼.
When I was young I was in a rush to grow up, believing that I can do whatever I want, whenever I want— it was all a lie.
I thought everything was better when you get to decide for your own, I ended up regretting every decisions I have made.
Looking back on it, everything was so simple. School was awful but at least there was a concrete destination. Living in this real world that we’re unaware of where it will lead us is terrifying— to have the feeling of ending up to nowhere is what makes it scary.
I wish to go back to those days where life was simple, I wish I didn’t take for granted those years, I wish I lived in the moment.
I had these thoughts while listening to Taylor Swift’s Never Grow Up. This song brings back nostalgia over my childhood, this song also makes me sad in a way that I miss everything back then when life was stress-free and kind of simple.
I just heard that a family friend of ours got sick and it has something to do with his liver, at first I felt really bad for him and he was a nice person but he drinks a lot. He starts his morning drinking beer then I started getting annoyed of the thought and I got quite mad at him. His loved ones are now worried because of it but I thought it isn’t a surprise for me why he got sick, just by looking at his lifestyle it was bound to happen and I’m frustrated of the thought of people living their life to the fullest by being reckless and irresponsible that their family gets to suffer because of it. I know how people say that it’s all about being happy and enjoying life but to what extent? Until your organs fail and you’re on your sick beds in your 40’s? Where your family spends their days worrying about you until you just die because you didn’t take care of yourself, you think you’re still young to be drinking till you drop and smoke until your lungs give up.
I hate to see family members of those sick people suffering because these sick people didn’t care about themselves. They think their body is stronger each year that they get older when it’s the opposite, our body becomes more fragile and our organs become more weaker as we get older that is why we need to take care of it. It’s not cool anymore to be getting drunk everyday when you’re in your 40’s. When you are at this age, it’s time to be more active in living a healthy lifestyle and it doesn’t only benefits you, it’s also for your family. It shows that you care about them and you want to live longer to be there with them and take care of them. Please don’t let your family suffer, take care of yourself for them.
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