Warning: content in this post is not suited for younger viewers. If you decided to read this post, please be advised that the story is personal and in no way encouraging you to do things.
Trigger warning for recovering alcoholics.
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Category: Rants & Ramblings
I have opinions on stuff.
My First Job Interview (Embarrassing)
I was updating my resume and browsing through job listings online, then I just remembered that it’s been such a long time since my last job interview, and then I kind of reminisced through all the job interviews that I attended but my first job interview was such a total mess. Every time I remember it, I just cringe and wave away the thought out of my head. And then I thought this is a great story to tell on my blog and embarrassing as well. 😅
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I went to a lot of job interviews before landing my first job. And to be honest I hate job interviews, just the thought of starting over again and doing all the things for me to land a job is just so tiring. And, also I am not a people pleaser, so impressing a person is not something I’m good at. I hate having people judge me if I have what it takes to do a job, okay that makes me sound like a narcissist and full of myself but you get my point right? Okay, I’ll just imagine that you get what I’m saying here 😅. Anyways, I had my first interview with this great company. I was so nervous, good thing I had the weekends to prepare for it because I got the invitation for an interview on a Friday. So, the over analyzing person that I am, I researched a lot about possible questions in an interview. I saved my answer on my phone, tried talking to myself in front of the mirror. I picked out my clothes and I even bought a new shoes just for it. So, before I go over what happened on the day of the interview there are some things you should know about me. I am a socially awkward person and I freak out over slight inconvenience, and some people think I am well put together because I don’t really show my emotions but deep inside I’m really freaking out.
So, fast forward to the interview, I was so early like an hour early for it, I hate being late but I overdid it 😂. I went to a convenience store to past time, and left to go to the interview 30 minutes early. I got there and I approached the not so nice receptionist, and point me to the couch with other applicants to wait. Minutes later she handed out forms for us to fill up and that was the start of the mayhem… I forgot to bring a pen. I know right? I had the weekends to prepare but I forgot to bring one of the most important thing. 🤦🏻♀️ So, I nicely asked the receptionist if she could lend me one and she said ‘NO’ in an intimidating way, and she followed it up with “There’s a convenience store at the ground floor, you can buy one”. I was so irritated because I was on the 24th floor, so it would really took me a long time to get back. I panicked, I was like “oh, okay. I’m sorry”. I was looking around the room, I wanted to asked the other applicants or even the security guard by the door but I was so aware of the receptionist looking at me. I was thinking of just going down to the convenience store but thankfully, I thought of asking someone on the 23rd floor which was one floor lower from where I was at. I took the stairs and there was a guard there and I borrowed his pen and at first he was like, “we’re not supposed to lend you because you should have brought your own” but he still lend it to me (thank you to that guard). I stride back in to the 24th floor, the receptionist was looking at me and I wanted to show her that I had my ways. 😏😂
Finally, the interview came which I was late for because they let us took a lunch break after we did the assessment. I came back late for it 😂 Imagine that? I was late?! When I was an hour early before. Anyways, I pretty much blew up the interview, I buckled a lot for most questions. My voice was shaking, I wasn’t comfortable and confident. I mean who answers the question “When are you willing to start?” with “next month”??? You basically answer this question: “as soon as possible”, and I answered “next month” I didn’t even know why. 🤣 Looking back at it, I still laugh at myself. It was probably the worst interview of all interviews. I wonder what was in the interviewer’s head at that time. I wouldn’t hire me if I was her.
But, I also did said to myself at that time to not expect that it will be flawless because it was my first time. That was my first taste of ‘adulting’. It was embarrassing but it was an experience I will never forget because I learned so much from it. I think I got a lot of better at it, I don’t overthink that much anymore during interviews and I’m more relaxed now. To any employers out there hire me! 😄
What was your first job interview like? Can you top my embarrassing job interview moment? Share it in the comments! 😄
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Just A Thought…
Why do many people rely on what they read online to tell them what their personality is?
This is just a random rambling while I’m listening to Keane’s Everybody’s Changing. I randomly started being skeptic on things again, like I always am. I always have this phase where I question everything, even the things that I’m passionate about. Like, this blog, I often question why people read this stuff written by a frustrated writer which is me. I’m a complicated girl, the thoughts in my brain is a gift because I never ran out of ideas to write about but most of the time I see it as a curse. For instance this ridiculous thought that turned into a blog post.
I suddenly started thinking about personality tests I don’t know why. But I kind of wanted to know why do many people want other people or some tests to tell them what their personality is? I mean, I get how it helps others to find what careers are compatible with them, I also get how it helps people to understand themselves more. I mean I took one back then, and I even posted it here. So, my hypocrite-self is questioning that test now 😂. It was 3 years ago, and I was struggling with finding myself at the time. Okay, enough about defending my hypocrisy 😆. Is it really even reliable? And here I am questioning Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. There are billions of people and we all have different personalities, and these tests are limited. I mean some questions on these tests are like which do you prefer cats or dogs (just for example and context) what if your answer is neither? What if all the questions are something like that? Right? How will that identify your personality?
Like, I said there are a lot of personalities, these tests just put people in boxes. Like, you’re this type of person, and your friend is this type etc. It just confuses people more. Anyways, this thought widened even more, now I started thinking about astrological signs. 😂
Who decided this by the way? Who decided that Virgos are perfectionists that worries too much or how Scorpios are passionate but also stubborn? etc. I used to think how cool it was to identify yourself like these, like you’re one with the cosmic universe. I even almost decided to have my astrological sign as a tattoo. But right now, I’m in my skeptic mode. I’m trollin astrological signs lol just kidding. But you get the point, right? Why do we rely so much on others’ words to tell us how we feel? Or who we are?
Because most of us don’t know how to put it into words and these stuff somehow help us understand what we were feeling in some ways.
See how I answered my own question? This is just a glimpse of what’s really going on in my head. It’s constant debate and fighting with myself 😂. There’s a reason why this blog is called Gigantic Thought Bubble.
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Cancel “Cancel Culture” #JustSaying
I want to say some things about this trend called “Cancel Culture”. I don’t know why people nowadays became so entitled to their opinions that they think it’s okay to “cancel” someone just because they dislike or got “offended” by a simple statement of a celebrity or personality that they read in too much.
I’m referring to Tyler Joseph’s tweet that some people got offended. He made a joke about using his platform to talk about important things.
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I get how “woke” people are now, especially with everything that has been going on with the world. It’s a crazy world right now, and it’s nice to see how people are socially aware about politics and world issues but forcing someone to speak about these issues is a bit too much, people has ways and process to choose what they believe in. Most people are still trying to figure it out, some people are neutral about stuff. And with Tyler Joseph, his “fans” were forcing him to use his platform to spread a message, he made a joke that I actually find corny lol. But people read in too much to it. Someone said that he mocked his fans with that tweet, when in fact Tyler has a dark and weird sense of humor at times. Check his tweets, it’s full of them. He even makes fun of his fans. Anyways, this guy has been using his platform ever since, with his music he saved thousands of lives (including me). And people don’t really need to post it online as a way to support a cause. And you can’t force someone to speak up, they will if they want to.
It’s funny how “fans” treat celebrities and personalities, like they are owed, and these celebrities should do whatever their fans ask them to do. If you don’t like what people does or say on social media, then stop following them instead of spreading it more, which adds more toxicity to this world. This cancel culture needs to stop, I feel sorry for celebrities sometimes they’re not allowed to make mistakes, that’s why a lot of them don’t really go on social media nowadays. And by the way, what effect does this really do? What does cancelling someone does for you? There’s so many bad things happening in this world, and cancelling someone does not solve it. So, I’m cancelling cancel culture. #JustSaying
What are your thoughts about this “Cancel Culture”?
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5 Tattoos I Have And What It Means
This is a follow up post from 5 Random Facts About Me That No One Asks For. Some of you asked me about my tattoos, here it is. 😄 I don’t have the greatest tattoos but it really means a lot to me.
I have a total of 5 small tattoos now. I became fascinated with tattoos because of my sister, and from the bands that I listened to back then. I thought they were really cool to look at, and I was just really curious what it was like to have it.
1. Puzzle piece with branches and birds
This was my first tattoo, I got it when I was 17. I’m not really that proud of it, most of my tattoos were just based on impulse. I was torn between having a puzzle piece, trees, or birds and I stumbled upon this design that got it all.
The story behind this is very dramatic 😅 I was 17, I got all that teen angst lol. Anyways, people assume that having this tattoo is me finding a missing puzzle piece in my life but no. The single puzzle piece is me, being alone trying to fit in and wanting to belong. The branches represents the growth in me and the birds are just for freedom. I don’t really want to expound on that, I find it too cheesy 😆.
I’ve written about it years ago, you can read it more here: THINGS I’M TIRED OF HEARING BECAUSE OF MY TATTOO
2. Truce with wings
This is a Twenty One Pilots’ song that really means a lot to me, I love Twenty One Pilots, this band means a lot to me. There was this line in the song where most people get as a tattoo “The sun will rise and we will try again”. I was not really open about my mental health back then, like I said in my story, I bottled up my emotions. And that line from the song gives that away. So, I got the song title instead which is very cryptic just the way I like it. I remember Tyler Joseph, explaining this title which was like, he’s been battling with himself and now he’s saying truce to himself (or something like that), and that really got to me.
When I got this tattoo, everybody was asking me what it meant. And I’ve always been saying “it’s a song from Twenty One Pilots, just listen to it”. The meaning of the song is the meaning of the tattoo itself. 😊
I wrote a little piece about it here: TRUCE
3. Cross
This tattoo represents my faith. I want to talk more about my faith but I’m still trying to form words where I can explain my beliefs further. It’s kind of a messy story, and I will save it in a more elaborate post.
4. Rose
This tattoo doesn’t really mean anything, I just really wanted it lol. But then my boyfriend got one for himself and now it looks like we got matching tattoos 🙄, and it suddenly meant something.
5. Lotus flower
I really like the term rooted from mud, and lotus is that flower. It grows from the dirtiest waters but it blooms. It’s cheesy but I feel like a lotus most times, I feel like I’m always in the mud of sadness and dirty water of darkness but I still grow.
Those are my tattoos, they are not the best ones but it really means a lot. Sometimes when you get a tattoo, it’s not really the outcome that you crave for, it’s the experience and feeling of getting it. 😊 If you’ve been wanting to get a tattoo, don’t be afraid. Don’t be afraid of what the society might say, we’re progressing anyway. A lot more people are very fond of people having tattoos nowadays and if they aren’t, screw them. 😆
Do you have any tattoos? Share the story of it in the comments. 😊
Related Posts:
5 Random Facts About Me That No One Asks For
There Will Be A Turning Point | Sharing My Story
THINGS I’M TIRED OF HEARING BECAUSE OF MY TATTOO
TRUCE
FRANK FRIDAY|02
I LOVE TWENTY ONE PILOTS
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