Suddenly The Lights Are Up And Bright | Importance of Changing Perspective

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It is easy to absorb negativity from this world and generation we currently live in. It is easy to fall and give in to criticisms and setbacks. It is truly a sensitive world right now where it’s quite difficult to keep a positive attitude. We are all aware of what is happening around us through different channels that is conveniently available to us. Therefore, we developed a high sense of consciousness towards everything that we do; is this acceptable by the society? Am I doing it right? etc. These internal monologue we often do leads to insecurities that also leads to a negative impact in the way we perceive our day-to-day approach and decisions.

In today’s time everything feels like a race, everyone wants to achieve a certain milestone in lesser time. Like, at 25 I need to have this and that, and by 45 or 50 I should retire. It’s amazing how everyone has these types of goals in their life but it also sets unrealistic standards and goals for some. Especially to those who are not given the same privilege. I get it how people say that putting hard work pays off but not everyone is given the same opportunities. Like, in this society that often looks at a prestigious background of applicants—those who came from a top 4 universities already has the upper hand apart from those who graduated from a university that most people haven’t even heard before. Employers won’t weigh who’s more of a hard worker, they will pick or give initial screening based from their resumes. It is an unfair world and you can’t really say that you just have to work hard, those who are underprivileged needs to work twice as hard if they want to meet such standards.

Having these factors weigh in on your life; the unfair society, the criticisms, the pressure, and the comparisons, why would you add a negative thinking to all of that? It is difficult to overcome all of that and it is much more difficult when yourself adds on to that weight by thinking that you can’t overcome challenges and when you think that nothing is going your way. It’s so important today to change perspective and see everything as just another challenge and another problem to solve, and not a wall or a boundary that stops you. I see a lot of people being so negative that they just sulk in the corner and wait for a miracle to happen.

One thing I have realized in my 24 years of existence is that you are your worst enemy. And for the past years I have learned how important it is to have a positive outlook. Okay, I am not saying that you should be positive all the time because that is unhealthy. It is important that you acknowledge every emotions that you have. What I mean from a positive outlook is that you still look forward to things, you see challenges as a learning opportunity or something that will contribute to your personal growth. After having that setback you should channel that to be more motivated to start again. During this pandemic, I quit my previous job and I was unemployed for half a year. I was on and off from being depressed and anxious to being productive. I was in this crazy mental state on whether I should give up since everything slowed down or I should fight my usual depressed self. I chose the latter, I started up being active on this blog again as part of the plan to stay productive, I became more active with my chores. I chose to act rather than to sit and sulk.

Changing perspective isn’t overnight. I guess for me it happened in a time where the world suddenly stopped and changed its’ usual ways. I had a lot of time to introspect without any distractions and everything really slowed down that I caught up with my thoughts. I felt like there’s something inside my brain that suddenly lightens up and I somehow see my life more clearly than I did before. There’s suddenly that excitement to move forward. I turned my cynical self into a hopeful and ideal type of person (sort of).

You are your biggest cheerleader

and achieving a positive perspective is very beneficial in this life where everything suddenly feels possible and within your reach. It is a confirmation that

yourself is indeed your worst enemy but also yourself is your greatest friend that will help you overcome everything.

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Don’t Compete With My Misery

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I know very well in trying to comfort people we need to relate to them and tell stories that are similar to what they were going through but it’s different when you try to shift the attention towards you with your own miserable story and it feels like a competition.

I tend to notice toxic people who do this a lot and I experienced this a lot as well. They try to make you feel that they understand you by telling their own problems but making it seem like what they were experiencing is way worst than yours which makes you feel pathetic by having that problem in the first place. Thinking about these types of people are the reason why most people are so conscious to talk about their problems. It’s one thing to disregard the problem on hand but to compete with it is way more irritating, like “should I be the one to comfort you instead when I’m the one who came to you with a problem? “

When your friend or family member comes to you with a problem, most of the time all they want is an ear unless they ask for advice. I know that sometimes we have nothing to say when someone comes to us with a problem and that’s okay just be there for them, you don’t need to reply. They just need to release their frustrations to someone, they don’t need for you to tell them that their problems are not real, they don’t need to hear your problems as well at the same time unless they ask for you to share it. We all need to learn to hear and just listen, and not to hear and reply.


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Sometimes I Wonder…

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Often times I find myself wondering about all of my “what ifs” but not with remorse but with just the thought of an alternate reality. I often think of “if I did this or that” what would it be like now? Would everything be different or am I exactly where I am right now even if I get the chance to redo the choices I took in the past?

There’s this new theory about time travel, it says that time travel is possible but you can’t change the past and it won’t affect the future. The outcome will always be the same no matter how you try to change the past. This made me think that all the sufferings and all the challenges that I had faced was meant to be and cannot be prevented. Everything that I am experiencing then and now is really going to happen no matter how hard I try to avoid it. Well, that theory is kind of unfair. It means that we don’t have a choice in this life. It’s like if you were born lucky then great but if not well I’m sorry, it is what it is. That theory just said “life isn’t like Bandersnatch that you get hundreds of alternate outcomes”.

But I think of this alternate world where everything was according to my plan and everything was perfect, exactly not the reality that I have right now. But would life make sense if I live in that world? Living in that perfect world without the wisdom I learned from the challenges and experiences I gained, would it be worth it? Knowing both your alternate reality and your reality now, you can never choose. In both worlds you’re going to gain and lose whichever you pick. I guess that’s why we can’t go back in time because God knows we can be too greedy, and want to have it all.


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To All The Ones Who Aren’t Good Enough

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We’re living in a world where competition is high and we compare ourselves with each other. Even though each and everyone of us is unique in our own ways, we couldn’t help ourselves to think if we’re better than them. Often times we’ll find ourselves in situation where we’re faced with the ugly truth— we’re just not good enough.

There’s always going to be someone better than us in this world but if you want to be the best you have to put in work and dedication. Being the best takes time, and it also takes a lot of failures. There are a lot of rejections along the way but not being good enough is not a sign of being a failure, it is a phase from becoming the best.

If we ever go back to our past failures and rejections, we now know better. We are not good enough back then because we didn’t have the experience and wisdom but if we go back knowing the things we know now, we’re more than good enough back then. We are all born to be good enough, we were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. We just didn’t have all the tools yet at that certain time. We just needed time to gain experience and wisdom.


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Spirits of Christmas – Flickering Lanterns

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It’s the happiest time of the year, this one corner house is where everyone goes, where every holidays the lanterns hang by the door are greeting guests with its luminous presence and brightest colors. Beyond the lights and cheerful decorations, behind the smiles and niceties is a family living a double life where darkness lies.

Full of bruises and scars, trying very hard to keep the walls standing. Christmas is their day to make it right every year, thinking even just for a day to live peacefully where the lights shine the brightest to blind them even just for a little while.

And it’s like the lanterns hide the deepest secrets of this house, using them as a cover and mask from what’s inside. Every year these lanterns see what truly happens in this house and it feels like these hanging lights absorbs the atmosphere. All of a sudden without anyone looking the lanterns start flickering, like any minute it’s going to explode just like the house and the people inside it. The house with the brightest colors and fancy decorations is now covered up with splash of red and barricade tape.


Spirits of Christmas is a four part series of whimsical stories about Christmas decorations we often use and their hidden stories. The idea and imagination of what it would be like if these said decorations can speak and feel. What it’s like for them when this time of the year comes, does it also feels like Christmas for them?

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Related Post:
Spirits of Christmas – Mr. Fine the Pine Tree

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