In the words of Paramore, forgiving is not forgetting. Let’s talk about the problem with the saying “forgive and forget”, you can and should forgive but you should NEVER forget. You got hurt, a person did something bad to you, you can’t just forget that. That was a lesson and a warning, you can forgive them for the sake of your peace of mind but you should still look out for those signs, and it is not about having trust issues, it’s about protecting yourself.
I personally learned that this was the way to go, to move forward with life. So many people did me wrong and I didn’t know why I felt guilty because I said to myself that I forgave them but deep inside I was still hurt, and I didn’t forget what they did. I just couldn’t forgive them and just forget what they did to me, that was a lesson for me that I should have known from the start and I will be a complete idiot if they get to do it again. Then I started thinking to just move on and not be bothered by them anymore, I should just cut them off and stop caring if they’ll feel like that I am not the same person that I was before and that is their fault (that sounded so bad). It’s like for me, okay I forgive them, I don’t really care that much anymore about what happened but I will not let myself go through that again, what’s important is my inner peace, and it’s better if I just move on without them.
Okay, that sounded so bitter but it’s the best way to take care of your mental health. Why would you let yourself be pressured into fixing a relationship when you know they are never going to change? If the things they did to you is just a cycle, they say sorry then it’s fine, then it will happen again. Forgiveness is about letting go of the anger, and freeing yourself from hatred. And to effectively do it is by moving on and leaving it behind but also carrying the lesson it gave you. It’s really better to just move on and protect your inner peace, you are wiser now. Don’t let them bother you again. So, stop the saying “forgive and forget”, it should be “forgive and move on”.
I’m leaving you with a Paramore song that inspired me to write this one…
Agreed. I’ve forgiven and forgotten what someone did to me. But then they repeat the same thing again.
So yeah, we should never forget that past and always keep those lessons with us
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Right? It’s kind of toxic how repetitive their behavior is. Thank you for reading 😊
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Its difficult to forget the past. Even if we forgive, something still remains at one corner of heart!
Well said!!💕💕
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Thank you 🤗
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Well said 🙂🙂
There is always something that forgetting lessons learnt will do no good
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Thank you 😊
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🙂🙂
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Agreed. It is good to forgive. Forgetting though, might as well be enabling a person to do it again. Remember and learn from the mistake. Set boundaries and build healthier relationships and make healthier life choices.
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Exactly 😊 thank you so much for reading 🤗
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You are most welcome, Joana.
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Agree. It is easy to forgive and so hard to forget lalo na kapag magsink in ulit at magflash black yung mga kasalanan sayo(hugot).
I had simillar post 3 years ago about the song: https://linagainsttheworld.wordpress.com/2017/06/06/music-monday-forgiveness-paramore/
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Mukhang malalim pinaghugutan mo diyan, girl!
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Oo hahaha, you know we can always forgive but we can’t forget 😜
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I agree. A beautiful principle to live by in life…will remember that. Thanks for this lovely reminder Joana ♥️
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It’s difficult to forget the past specially when it is really filled with a lot of toxic. I guess it’s better to just forget and move on.
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Yeah ❣️ You are right 👍
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Thanks for reading 🤗
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It’s easy for us to say.
Difficult for us to do.
But….we have to forgive.
That’s the reason God made us rational animals right.
Anyway, good thought💛
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I too believe this is the only way to move on. We are humans after all and no one can absolutely forget and forgive.
Sending good vibes over to you! 😊
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Thank you ☺️
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Forgiveness can be difficult at times but it’s better to move on. Clinging on to ugly memories can’t do anyone any good!
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Yes, exactly 😊 Thank you for stopping by 😊
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You are very welcome 🙂
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To forgive is good for peace of mind.
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It sure is
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